Published On: Wed, Jun 7th, 2017

Bill Maher Quotes

I don’t have any respect, no, I don’t have any respect for the tea-(baggers) [word silenced] and I do call them the tea-(baggers) [word silenced again] — even though they hate it. I will stop calling them Tea-(baggers) [word silenced for a third time] when they stop calling it Obamacare, that’s my deal. – April 25, 2011 on Late Night with David Letterman

I’m astounded that the Republicans can hold themselves out as the patriotic party. Somehow patriotism has gotten redefined as selfishness: never letting anybody take anything from you – especially the government – and never helping anybody. That’s not the patriotism that I grew up with. Patriotism would be for these millionaires and corporations who paid no taxes: Pay your fair share. – interview with Rolling Stone, April 28, 2011 issue

The American people don’t really care what side of an issue you’re on. They just don’t want you to act like a pussy. – interview with Rolling Stone, April 28, 2011 issue

It irks me to no end that people keep calling him “courageous.” Really? Courage would have been going after defense and rich people. His budget goes after children, the poor, the jobless. This is picking on the weakest kid on the playground and getting called courageous for it. And he doesn’t come close to solving the deficit. If you’re going to put out a fantasy document that appeals to the dickishness in your base, shouldn’t it at least accomplish the goal? – interview with Rolling Stone, April 28, 2011 issue (on Paul Ryan’s proposed budget cutting the Medicaid and Medicare entitlement obligations)

I’ve said it many times…if Muslim men could get laid more, we wouldn’t have this problem. There’s probably no suicide bomber [who] after he died, people said, ‘You know, that guy, he blew everybody up, but boy – he got laid a lot. – April 15, 2011 with Irshad Manji of NYU’s Moral Courage Project


I hate them as much as you do. – April 12, 2011 on the Rachel Maddow show

That’s what they did with this Paul Ryan budget plan which, of course, all over the idiot media talking about how brave he is. You know, I hear commentators, ‘yes, well, you know, he was the first one to put everything on the table.’ No. He didn’t put everything on the table. He didn’t put defense on the table. That’s not touched. Social security, where’s the courage in this plan of his? – April 12, 2011 on the Rachel Maddow show discussing Rep. Paul Ryan’s proposed budget

I want to present what I would consider a budget on my show Friday night, and it would include cutting the defense budget in half. I mean, it’s been almost doubled since 2001. If we just went back to what it was under Clinton and also went back to the tax rates under Clinton for the rich and for everybody else, we would save $7.5 trillion over the next ten years without taking money out of the mouths of starving children. How about that, Captain Courageous? – April 12, 2011 on the Rachel Maddow show discussing Rep. Paul Ryan’s proposed budget

But he’s so handsome and boyish. Have you heard about the workout that he does every day?…I guess it’s those dreamy eyes. (deadpan) – April 12, 2011 on the Rachel Maddow show making fun of the media a bit for being “man crushed” on Paul Ryan

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